2007
September 22nd
Another delayed, rave-review! I was at our church's family camp this weekend, and today another mom who I wasn't acquainted with told me her children just loved Fuzzy Land, and that they would bring it up when there was an argument or some conflict, asking "Do you feel fuzzy right now, or nuzzy?" Then their child would admit, "Nuzzy..." and they would all hug and laugh to get rid of it.
What a miracle! I know this didn't come from me, and I just hope I can live to see Fuzzy Land impact many more families the way it has this one.
September 9th
Today, a friend of a friend came up to me after church with her husband and said, "I know you don't know us, but we just had to tell you how much our child loves your book. We think it's wonderful, and hope you have much success with it." I was nearly speechless with fuzziness! I felt so encouraged to know Fuzzy Land was making a difference, even though I had stopped focusing on it. To know that I had made a difference by not giving up!
So can you!
June 17th
Happy Father's Day! I visited my old church in Orange County and sold 8 copies to long-time friends, and some parents of the children I read to in the Sunday classes. When I went to spend time with my Dad, he bought 5 copies to help me sell to people he knew. I was touched, and left with a warm, fuzzy feeling of hope and faith. Now, there are only 7 copies left to sell! I have 2 weeks left. I believe everything will work out.
I am so grateful to God for blessing all of these efforts...
June 16th
I went out door-knocking to business to ask for donations or gifts I could raffle, but they gave me the paper-work route and not a lot of hope. Maybe I can try them again when I have more time and organization. I'm definitely learning a lot about fundraising, but this experience was a bit discouraging. The nuzz crept in.
June 14th
It's been a while since I posted something here, but I'm happy to report that an article for my book was published online two days ago at DisciplesToday.com, and I've already received 2 orders online from the exposure. That brings my total number of books left to sell down to a measly 23! Slowly but surely, the seeds are sprouting.
June 2nd
My good friend told me he gave my book to his 3-year-old niece, who after hearing the book read to her once, asked to hear it again. Apparently, her mother was reading it to her yet again as my friend and I were talking.
This kind of news makes me so happy! I appreciate all the wonderful praise I receive from adults about Fuzzy Land, but nothing brings me greater joy than hearing how children themselves find delight and inspiration in the story.
May 29th
The word is slowly spreading, and I felt a burst of fuzz as I saw another email notifying me that someone had purchased my book online. Someone from Arizona! I don't know how they found out about the book, but I'm just grateful the seeds are growing. Hard work really does pay off, if you are patient and don't give up!
May 22nd
While visiting my sister in Massachusetts, I gave an impromptu reading at my 1-year old niece's daycare center. The care-takers all loved Fuzzy Land, and asked if I had any copies with me to sell and sign, but I didn't. So, I wrote the web address on a few of their white-boards, and my sister left her copy of Fuzzy Land for mothers to read and preview. It was so fun, and the kids really enjoyed dancing along with the fuzzies. I noticed that the 2-3 year olds responded better and were more engaged than the infants.
It was great to see that my niece recognized the book, because when I pulled it out to start reading, she came crawling up to me in fast-forward just to get at it. Hilarious! I think she made it from the back of the room to the front in under 3 seconds.
So, maybe I'll be going on tour someday, if I keep getting receptions like this.
May 1st, 2007
It's heeeere!
I picked up my first 50 copies of my book today. They look great! All this hard work is paying off, and I'm so excited to send out my first few copies.
First Fuzzy Reading
Yesterday, I scheduled my first reading at a children's book store called "Blue Chair Books," in Glendora. The owners were very kind and helpful in finding a time that worked for both of us, and I can't wait to see the expressions on the children's faces when I read the book. I don't know how many copies I'll sell, but I feel so rewarded just spreading the message of fuzz and watching God do greater things with it than I could imagine.
April 25th, 2007
Publishing at Last
After weeks and even months of exchanging art files and e-proofs, my book is finally going to print! I hope to pick up 50 brand-spankin'-new copies sometime in the next 2 weeks. They're not perfect, but they'll do. This is the best I can do right now, and I'm learning to be satisfied with that. More fuzz!
April 11th, 2007
Airfare Miracles
Great news! I've been checking prices for flights to Guatemala (just to catch any great deals out there), and I found a round-trip flight for $257 (INCLUDING TAXES.) Get this...the airline I booked the flight on is called "Spirit." I've never even HEARD of that company before. If God isn't making it possible for me to do this, I don't know who is.
My trip will be for 2 months, July and August, which is about all my Visa is good for, anyway. My new goal is to train the teachers of the HOPE school how to incorporate drama, dance, music, and art into their lessons--basically to do what I would have done had I been able to stay longer. And I'll help HOPE in any other way I can during my stay.
Not exactly what I set out to do at the beginning, but still very good. I'm learning to be flexible.
Oh, and I've also just been hooked up with a free Delta voucher good for any round-trip flight in the U.S., so I'm using it to get to the HOPE Global Summit in Washington, DC in May. That's an international conference where HOPE representatives from all over the world come to share about the programs going on, and to let people interested know how to help. If I can establish connections with other programs around the world, I might be able to take this educational enrichment program to other HOPE schools, to spread hope through the arts to underpriviledged children everywhere.
Spreading hope and fuzz is the goal of this book, after all.
April 3rd, 2007
More Warm Fuzzies!
I'm getting more vocal about my book and purpose. I talked to one Guatemalan teenage girl today about it at school, and she wants to spread the word to her grandmother, who loves to buy books for her children.
Then, I was bombarded with fuzziness when eating at Denny's with my friends from church. I showed one of my friends a copy of the book, and suddenly, a crowd was forming to read it. They passed copies back and forth between each other, until a mother and 5th-grade teacher read it and started getting tears in her eyes. I asked her to respond to the book so I could put it on the back cover, and her friend (who happens to be a literary coach!) wrote one, also.
Then another friend asked if she could tell her friend about my book, because he wanted to make some kind of animation out of a children's book. She also said she'd start working on finding people at the LA Times or other newspapers to review my book.
Woah, this is getting beyond me. I guess it's true: you need to recruit lots of help if you want to do something big. No one person can do everything---not the way many people can do something. I'm learning to trust others, and to be comfortable not really having control over where this goes.
And I feel so supported by my friends and family!
Yesterday, my sister bought the first copy to be sold from my website. Hers will be the first one I send in the mail once I print them.
I can't begin to express the gratitude I feel for what I'm experiencing in all of this. My faith in who God is in my life is being stretched beyond my imagination.
April 2nd, 2007
Risk Factor
Tonight, I drove to Irvine to see Dr. Townsend, co-author of the Boundaries book series, who was giving a lesson on risks as part of a "Solutions" seminar series. I had a copy of my book ready to give to him, and after his enlightening talk, I decided to put some of his points into practice. I mustered my courage and approached him on the stage to introduce myself.
He was very warm and encouraging when I showed him my book, but for some reason I still fought insecurity. Maybe I didn't want to seem like just another groupie, or some pushy person out to get something out of him. I was afraid of what he might think of me, or the book. Maybe it wouldn't matter at all to him, and it would be in the trash within days, and he'd think I'm a silly child, and...you get the idea. Of course, in my rational mind, (indeed, even as I type this), these thoughts are wrong. Yet the feeling of them in the moment was very real.
I guess I'm learning that courage to risk comes in taking action despite those feelings, despite the worste possible outcome, because you're hoping for the best one. And I think it's becoming more acceptable for me not to be perfect.
Here's to taking bolder risks and overcome fears!
March 30th, 2007
Warning: This blog entry may contain mathematical calculations.
I spoke with the CEO of the printing company today, at last! He was very helpful and offered a great deal that I could afford, and that would allow me 6 months to sell 1,000 copies, ordering 50 books at a time. I'll still be paying the higher price of $18.60 a book, but after selling 500 books, I'll be reimbursed $3.15 a book, and after selling 1,000 or more, I'll be reimbursed another $0.65 per book. That means I'll really have only paid $14.80 each hard-back, and can still make the $10 profit I was hoping for without breaking my piggy-bank on buying 1,000 books at once!
Thank you, God.
March 29th, 2007
I'm back!
I just recovered from a week-long battle with the worst flu I've had in years. Today is the second day of normalcy, and though it's been impossible to focus on getting my book printed, I'm ready to start harrassing the printing company again. I need to get in touch with the CEO, but apparently, that's more difficult than I thought it would be.
You know, this is kind of fun---I'm beginning to look forward to the next obstacle I need to hurdle to . It just makes the goal more challenging to achieve, and we all know how I love a good challenge. Muah ha ha. What's life without striving? Without growth? Without progress?
Of course, what good is striving if you can't enjoy how far you've come? As soon as I get this order worked out, I'm going to reward myself with some good sushi.
March 19th, 2007
Just A Minor Setback
So, I recalculated how many books I need to sell if I only make $5 profit on each one instead of $10. The minimum amount I need to raise for only myself, then, would be around $12,000, which means I need to sell 2,400 copies by the end of June. It could still happen. I am praying for a miracle. Perhaps the owner of the printing company will give me a great discount.
March 16th, 2007
Another Nuzzy Glitch
So, I came home to find the first proof of my book sitting on my door-step. I opened it with so much excitement...and was so disappointed. The soft cover was bent and hacked-looking, and the color of the cover seemed drab and listless. The binding in the center of each page looked bubbled and like it might come apart altogether once some 3-year old got its hands on it. The spine had no text and the pages seemed thinner than I expected. It screamed amateur.
This is a set-back. It will take time to print another proof in the hard-back version, and for me to approve it again, and of course I'll have to go with the hard-back, and alter the cover to make sure the colors are vibrant and alive. It will be more expensive, and I'll make less profit on each book, but I just can't put it out there like this.... It's my baby!
Who knew pursuing a dream would be so much work and sacrifice and risk? I mean, they always tell you it will be, but...actually experiencing it brings new meaning and understanding. And reward. It's rewarding to fight for something! Here's to overcoming nuzz!
March 13th, 2007
My First Order!
Tonight, I read a prototype of my book to some friends at church, and one of the ladies visiting wanted to buy 2 copies right then and there! I took her information, and went home elated. This woman had been feeling negative and a little depressed, but after I read my book, I could see the hope glimmering in her eyes. I wanted to cry inside with joy, because I remembered the feelings I poured into the book, and she helped me remember what it was like to read it for the first time.
All of this is more than worth it...if only one life is touched.
February 24th, 2007
Clinging to Hope
Today, as I pack my things for another move (at 4 moves since 2006, I'm averaging one every 3 months), I realize how much stuff I have, but don't need. And, I realize how accessible everything is. I'm not desparate for anything. I'm so fortunate to have been born here in America...
Packing up my belongings has also helped me become excited to travel again. I like the freedom of not having a lot of...stuff. Maybe I'm a minimalist at heart. It's nice to have stability, but there's just something about the adventure of the unknown. I know it's not comfortable (just like moving again isn't comfortable), but I know it'll work out. Just like Guatemala. I know it won't be comfortable, but I know it will work out. And nothing can replace the experience.
As George Michael put it, I gotta have faith.
February 16th, 2007
Nuzzy Doubts
I'm hitting a slump lately as I work towards publishing the book. I have had to edit the files over 10 times (and there are over 50 files I've had to edit.) I've lost count of the hours I've put into this project, but I'm sure I'm well into the hundreds. At this point, it feels like monotonous labor, without the inspiration and hopefulness of creating.
On top of that, I've been feeling some fear about moving to another country. Reading the book "If You Want to Walk on Water, You've Got to Get Out of the Boat" has been helping me confront it. Today I read into a chapter called "Focusing on Jesus." Like Peter the apostle, I've been noticing the wind and the waves (the difficulties of my journey), and fear is stealing my hope and motivation.
Today, I'm refocusing on the hope and the true purpose of my goal (to spread love and joy to others), with the faith that God won't give me more than I can handle, and that he will give me the strength and ability I need to do the impossible.
Even if things don't work out as I plan them...
January 24th, 2007
I created this---the Fuzzy Blog. I thought it might be nifty to have one. I'm sure I'll think of a good use for it eventually.
For now, how about a little back-story?
The Birth of Fuzzy Land
So, I created Fuzzy Land as a final project for my Children's Literature class at Cypress Community College. I was about 18 years old (so about 6 or 7 years ago), and back then, I was a huge procrastinator. (Maybe I just worked better under pressure.) The week before the assignment was due, I got to work.
Now, I had been mulling over ideas for the project before, but nothing caught my interest until I had a sudden stroke of genius as I was leaving a visit with my dad. At that time, he happened to be living at one of those gated communities with all of the trees and artificial lakes and streams. It was during the spider-season, when all the garden spiders are out building webs and stringing their lines right across the sidewalk path.
It was as I was swinging my arms in front of me to avoid walking through the webs (isn't that the WORST?) that I realized that children might be afraid of spiders as much as I used to be. Then I thought about another insect I used to fear---the dreaded bee. From there, all the Fuzzy creatures popped into my brain, and the story practically wrote itself.
Driving home, I began repeating in rhyme the entire story of Fuzzy Land (give or take some lines), and typed it up as soon as I got to my computer. That weekend, I glued myself to my computer chair and illustrated the story from cover to cover. Despite being a perfectionist as much as a procrastinator, I was very productive because of the looming project deadline. I didn't have a chance to be picky about every detail, or I probably never would have finished the book.
Maybe procrastination and perfectionism are another form of nuzz.
